Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Mumbo Jumbo Updated

The following is a song from a 60s play, "Stop The World - I Want To Get Off." The song is sung by Littlechap, who's running for the House of Commons, and is meant to mock political speeches which use key phrases amidst the "mumbo jumbo," but actually say nothing. I simply updated it for today's American elections.

Mumbo Jumbo Updated
Littlechap begins to campaign, as the Chorus sings:

Vote for Littlechap! Vote for Littlechap!
Vote for Littlechap! Vote for Littlechap!
For Littlechap!

Girl: Fellow citizens, our speaker for tonight is the Opportunist candidate for this constituency, Mr. Littlechap.

Littlechap sings:

Mumbo Jumbo, rhubarb rhubarb,
Tickety bubarb yak yak yak.
Mumbo jum red white and bluebarb,
Goldman Sach's on it's back.

Mumbo Jumbo, rhubarb rhubarb,
Nothing newbarb cha cha cha.
Mumbo Jumbo BP's spillbarb.
I think someone's gone too far!

Mumbo Jumbo, rhubarb rhubarb,
Voulez-vousbarb avec moi?
Mumbo Jumbo entrez-nousbarb,
Paris Hilton ooh la la!

Girl: Ladies of the Book of the Month Guild, it is my pleasure to introduce the Opportunist candidate for this constituency, Mr. Littlechap!

Mumbo Jumbo, rhubarb rhubarb,
Has Pakistan got the bomb?
Holy cowbarb if it's truebarb,
We'll be blown to kingdom come.

Chorus: You've got a bomb, We've got a bomb, All God's children got bombs.

Mumbo Jumbo, rhubarb rhubarb,
Give Bear Stearns more free cash.
Helps the nation, stops inflation.
How's your mortgage? Wall Street crash.

Chorus: We wanna be rich with money to burn.

Mumbo Jumbo, rhubarb rhubarb,
Housing Market can't go wrong.
APR's sky rocket,
In plans four score long.

Mumbo Jumbo, rhubarb rhubarb,
Here everybody's free.
Give the homobarbs their rights,
Just don't tell the G.O.P!

Mumbo Jumbo, rhubarb rhubarb,
Up your flubarb, City Hall.
And, dear friends, if I'm elected,
I'm all right, Jack--screw you all!

Littlechap wins the election by a landslide.

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